At the Push of a Button

Not everyone finds it easy to get a date: firstly you have to find someone you like. For me, specific type does not even cut it: certain height, certain hair colour, certain sense of self. That or a professional rugby player, either will work.

But that’s not half of it. They have to want you and the two don’t often come hand in hand.

So wouldn’t it be great if there was an app you could use to find people, see if they’re all that great and decide if you want them before meeting them. There is. Its called Grindr and its used by guys to find hot dates and anything else that might take their fancy. One of my friends has met many a guy on it, spent many an hour getting to know people and could go out any night he wanted. I have to wait for days where I have found the perfect dress and stayed of the martini.

There is a heterosexual version: it’s called Blendr. However, it doesn’t play by the same rules.
Everyone I know who has used it has done so for friendship and whilst I think you can’t have enough friends, an app purely for dating can’t be a bad thing.

But would we really use it? Critics claim it works for guys because being only 50 metres away from someone that wants you is a turn on. It is not the same for women - one of my friends repeatedly declares her love for someone who lives 300 miles away. What’s more, but one picture and a small line claiming what position is your favourite is not enough for me to go home with someone (no matter how amazing the position is). I would take meeting someone in the flesh any day.

Disengagement.

In the last two months, four of my close friends and family have got engaged. I'm not going to lie, when the first one of these four told me I was over the moon - a wedding primarily means a new dress and a chance to drink champagne in a nice venue.

However, by the fourth I felt a little different. How important is an engagement, really? It has been offered to us by many magazines that you must try to find ‘the one.’ Preferably, rich, hot, sentimental, clever and charming – probably even in that order. But paradoxically we are also told that marriage isn’t important anymore. Of course, this is all subject to opinion but as I am thrown into the world of wedding plans and dress disasters, I’m left to wonder whether ever I will prefer a wedding to living in a student flat eating cereal out of a mug because I possess no ability to wash up.

In this bubble, I wonder what changes engagement brings to a couple. For most, sex is no longer a thing to appreciate after marriage – whilst society has not yet come to terms with openly talking about sex, it is accepted by most that behind closed doors all manner of things happen. Why else would Ann Summers and FHM exist?

However, it is not just sex. I recently had a conversation with my flatmate which resulted in her asserting that she is planning two marriages; after all, the first one will probably end in divorce. Whilst this is cynical, it is most probably true which leads me to believe that nights out in the student union dressed in a  toga are most probably more fun.

I’m not denying that I will probably hit a crisis at some point due to all my friends being happily settled whilst I most definitely won’t be. But for now,  the only dress shopping I’ll be doing is for my friends twenty-first.